No Excuses…

turtle

Shame on me… my last post appears to be in December of 2017. So, why post now? Four months later?

While I may have no excuses, I suppose I have my reasons. Creativity poses not only opportunities to express, but also, to stop; in stillness  – to look around, to listen to something, albeit a lot of nothing. I think this is where meditation comes in. So why tie meditation and creativity together in this oddball way?

Doesn’t an artist simply splash a bunch of their genius on canvas at any time during the day or night? With nothing to stop or distract from the creative  process? I wish I could give plenty of answers or reasons why an artist, regardless of the medium, creates their best, or worst work…

The turtle may take its sweet time to get from point A, to point B, and in doing so, wastes no time in asking the how’s or why’s in life. I can hazard a guess as to what the turtle is really thinking: Get there in one piece, and watch out for anything that might tip me over…

“Anything that may tip me over”. And that’s where I came to complete stop.

I’ve spent a great deal of the last part of 2017, getting turned back over. Life, challenges, obstacles, self-trepidation, self-delusion, and self-forgiveness led me here – now – to a place of peace. Alas, 2018 has been about peace. The maintenance, nurturing, and suckling of peace, in all areas of my life. Does this mean I only create when there is chaos, confusion, and bunch of badness in my life? Yes and no. The reality is, where there is black, there is white. Evil, there is a sacred energy flowing through everything and everyone. Where there is good, there is bad. A negative has its positive.

Creativity’s job, is to present these energies in their truest forms. I can see better when I have a full unobstructed view of what’s real and what isn’t. Therefore, I create with full expression – unanswerable to all that would require an explanation of the unexplainable. And this is where I will leave it… the quest to express without prejudice, the beauty of all that is, coming to be, and all that is yet to be born – whether good, evil, black, white, and in color.

Many blessings,

Sandi

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Shades

waterfall

Shades of blue

reflect what is not you

and the lightest of hues

become what used to be

me

and all along the illusion

became real

a short distance of time

tricked me that you were mine –

the other part of me

that could see

colors dance

vibrant and bright

the lines no longer blurred

this is me,

the me I lost

the me I see

doesn’t belong to anyone

else but

… me

the colors no longer lost

the beauty all around

me, you, all nature within us

©Sandi Martinez

 

In the rough

cropped-holly-hock-red.jpg

When I first took this pic (above), it was spring of this year, 2017. The vibrant colors spoke to me. The star-like image in the center of this beautiful flower, reminded me that life always begins. Even when it ends. Winter had just wrapped up – the ground had already thawed.

As I look at my life now – mid-summer – hot, sticky, and well, wonderfully warm, I am brought back to this image. All life is now in full-bloom. All gardens are mature, and flowering… smiling. But somehow, I feel a bit rough around the edges. As if I’m not quite myself, and yet all the changes I’ve been through, have led me here: to a moment of understanding.

All life will continue living. Being. All the changes I’ve encountered mirror that. Though it hasn’t felt like it, this I realize is my inner truth: Through all the unknowns, worries, and more worries, one thing remains true, life continues to unfold. Will I continue to move with that sure movement, or will I hang  back observing, as if it isn’t my life?

I’d like to. Because the worst feeling is to feel as if there is no choice. My choice? Flow with the waters that eventually lead to the oceans of time, life, and love. Flow with universe and trust all has its own time. Trust that the universal power has the upper hand.

Oh, and smell the lovely roses in bloom, because soon, my favorite season will come: fall… in all its raving mad, colorful beauty!

 

Soul’s a callin’, are you listening?

IMG_20170527_201706Okay, so it’s June… Flowers blooming; scents overwhelming! Some of us are so busy being busy, we forget to stop and smell the roses – literally.

Some of us are gloomy, sad, worried, and seem to have lost a bit of hope and sunshine. Why? Change is upon us. The four season’s don’t care about the time, or place. When our soul’s are awakening, and we need something different, the soul stirs. Through clouds, sunshine, rain, snow, crazy winds, and everything in between, the soul is challenging us.

How do we make these changes? Moving house? A new job? Looking for a new job? Getting married, getting divorced, getting insane, getting sane… there is no easy answer. But the soul has a way of leading and guiding us. Sometimes, we call this intuition. Sometimes, we call it ‘a small voice’ in our heads. It doesn’t matter how we hear it. What matters is that we do hear it.

This can be a frightening time. If we do heed the call for change already happening, or just at the fringes knocking, it’s scary, there’s no other way around it. But when we cower from change, we become like the stick in the mud, the proverbial STICK IN THE MUD.

But HOW do we make these changes whilst keeping sane and staying in the exciting moment of stepping forward, and not falling back to the negative replays of the B.S. we have fed ourselves, since we could logically think? You just DO IT. Thinking too much, or avoiding thinking is a fine balance. The trick is in the doing.

I’m here folks. I’m here to cheer you on. Get your soul on, and walk forward, knowing every step you take, gets you closer. You are not alone. Every human on earth is facing something. And while not the same as you, it is change nonetheless. Need a free intuitive reading? I can help. All you have to do is donate over $20 to your favorite animal rescue org. Click Animal Rescue Org Enthusiast, for more info. I’m here to help.

Get your soul on, and fly your freak flags folks, it’s summer, the season of sun, love, love, and more love.

Many blessings!

Sandi

A dip in memory

My little man always enjoyed hide and seek! (Image: Sandi Martinez)

My little man always enjoyed hide and seek! (Image: Sandi Martinez)

I really enjoy house and pet-sitting, and I had a wonderful opportunity to do that over the last 4 days. There were 2 cats and 1 dog. The cats always had me on my toes – guessing what they were going to do next… the dog Maddy, was sweet and I truly believe an Angelic being.

What I mean by that, is that not only do dogs go to heaven, they also come from there, and just go back when it’s time. Much like it was time for my long-time animal companion, Samson. The days allowed me to meditate. To rest, and slow down. I sat on the veranda of this beautiful house set in El Dorado, NM, and watched the sun set. Intense oranges, yellows, reds, and purples, mixed as if on a painter’s palette. I saw epic thunder and lightning storms streak across the sky like chariots on fire. I saw sweet birds and hummingbirds feast on the sun, light, and food they gathered. I had time… a rare and strange event. The fact that time had no time limits.

While surfing the TV; satellite with various movies playing at once, I noticed my body relax, and my muscles became mush. This is about the time I worried my brain cells were slowly dying… (I never watch TV). Much to my relief, it was simply my brain taking a reprieve from all the mental gymnastics I make daily; second by second.

Today, my last day, I packed my things, and put them in my car. I played fetch with Maddy, (I’m pretty sure it was me fetching) and I loved on her and told her how much our time together meant to me. As I made my final check, I felt an overwhelming sadness overtake me. Maddy reminded me of my dog Samson who as some of you may remember, passed away this February. She looked deep into my eyes as if she understood my sadness. I tried to be enthusiastic that mom was coming home in just a few hours, but the tears won out, and at last, Maddy walked away and left me to deal with my pain, sadness, and loss.

This is why I believe she is an angelic being; she allowed me to feel my pain without taking it away, and yet her love washed over me in waves. Only an angel can do that.

Many blessings,

Sandi