Serenity

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I inhale sharply

the pain constricts

like a boa making

its way thru my ribs

 

It hurts, the fear mocks

me as if to say,

“I WIN”

I slump forward

 

But the flash of light

pulls me backward

its warmth too

hard to resist

 

It’s only then I realize

courage does exist

right here, right now

warmth of light shows me how

©Sandi Martinez

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Divine You

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Sheets of light

Wrap around me

And then flow through me

And suddenly underneath me

 

As if I’m walking on light

So bright

The reflection of white

Bounces back and all around

 

On the ground

Tears abound

How can I deserve this?

Silence, not a sound

 

I close my eyes

Blinding streaks

Burn through

And then I see finally,

The Divine you

 

©Sandi Martinez

Peace, a Natural State of Being

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Intentions – they outline our thoughts, that then lead to action. Simply put, without intention, there is no outline. We may have random thoughts that buzz around what we want, and think is the best course of action. But in reality, when we put those thoughts out to pasture, what seeds will they birth?

My neighbor, (where the above pic is taken) has this amazing apple orchard. It looks as if snow has covered all the trees, and yet conversely, there is grass; water pooling underneath, providing the nutrients these apple trees will need to survive. I was in awe. This pic symbolized peace.

Peace. A natural state of being we can achieve when not held down by negativity, fear, and self-loathing. The kind we do when we chop ourselves up into a million pieces thinking, ‘I could’ve done better’. Peace, the decision I made at the start of 2018. And you may ask, ‘Well, how’s that going so far?’ to which I would respond, ‘Splendidly’. Because if I think even for a minute that all of life’s big bombers have a chance of taking me down, I’ve already failed. But no. That’s not the case.

Serenity is something that we all I would like to think, like to achieve. But really, it’s during the chaos, the pain, the unforeseen bombs that come our way, that if we can maintain a modicum of peace through it all; that peace ultimately is born. Chaos is always there. Peace is always there. Ultimately, it’s a choice. If we maintain peace through the most difficult chaotic moments, we have ultimately slipped on the long-lasting effects of serenity.

That’s the blessing and miracles that peace offers. The constant chance of breathing, exhaling, inhaling, and exhaling again, all the bad, negative, evil, and ugly-tasting things in life, we don’t need to absorb. The things that miracles are made of.

Keep, keeping on…

Many blessings,

Sandi

 

Side effects

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One of the most common side effects of spiritual growth, is temper-tantrum-throwing. Yes, that’s right – stomping our feet, clawing at the floor or walls for dear life, as life pulls us ever deeper into the light. Screaming, yelling fits, self-pity, and yes, the recognition of all said behaviors above.

At the same time, this is absolutely beautiful. A painful, embarrassing, and beautiful process. And this is what I run into when people call me for a reading. And this is why I call it Divine Guidance. When I work with individuals from all walks of life, and they’re trusting me with sharing their problems, while looking for answers; I am filled with hope. I am honored.

Why? Because this is a sign that people want to change. They want to grow. They want and need or are looking for something different. I say a prayer prior to each reading. My prayer asks that the universe bring those to me, who are truly open to not only hearing the divine truth, but also are ready to make solid and ground-breaking progress on their path.

But what about those that aren’t there yet? Ahhh… a spiritual advisor can’t be picky. We can’t just want to help those that are ready and willing to be helped. Sometimes, it’s the ones that are the most confused, hurting, and broken people that are led to us – and most readily are the ones that require our patience, kindness, understanding, compassion, and light. These are the temper-tantrum throwers, and interestingly enough, are the ones I learn from the most.

Today, I say to universe, bring it on!

-Many blessings,

Sandi

 

Hope Knocks

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And I looked down

and my feet were brown

stained by dirt, and mud

my chin hit my chest

… a loud thud

and I cried

I reached out to thin air

the stuck breaths… I tried

to breathe, to leave

and find myself

 

To put all my troubles on the

top shelf

but the more I walked

my knees locked

my head a big bad mess

would the sadness stop,

become less?

 

Then I saw the streaks

yellow, blue, teak

and the rainbow broke through

and I saw you – my angel

nothing more to do

 

All this time, you were my cue

now I know

the mud will come off

my head will come back up

hope knocks

the door unlocked

 

©Sandi Martinez

A Look Back

WP Snow_Pecos.jpg[Photo Credit: Sandi Martinez]

Wind stops

snow flakes sparkle

seconds pass

spurs on mind’s chaos

winter coats the ground

a crunch underfoot

soon sprouts of green

will grow

just as my thoughts turn to snow

A look back

no better than before

better to know

nowhere to go

but back around

to solid, wet ground

back around to a past

come back around

the cold blows

my mind

knows

time

to

go

by Sandi Martinez

A New Tradition

I’d like to start first, by wishing you all a wonderful Christmas, and an even better and prosperous new year. As I say goodbye to 2016, I’m forced to look back at things I could have done better. At the risk of being a bit hard on myself, I might go as far to say, I know better. Many of you have seen me lately at my worst, with the two dogs that I took upon myself, to find homes for. First, I’d like to thank my nephew Lee, for caring for Ginger at a time I could no longer keep her in my apartment.  As of this moment, Ginger is now being fostered in Abiquiu, NM, by a lovely woman named, Janine, who was working with Donna Leshne from Dew Paws Rescue in Santa Fe, NM.

What started this mess, was the way the situation was mishandled by family members I would have never expected. I see it as throwing Ginger, and Lovey away – they see it as ‘we can’t take care of them anymore’. I know things happen, and life moves us in different directions, and that life in fact, is unpredictable. This however was not the case with Ginger, and Lovey. And so I am stuck with own inability to forgive and move forward. I’m stuck in this strange place of seeing my own pain, disappointments, and betrayals, and am forced to look deep into the chaos. As I do this, I don’t want to open up at the moment. I don’t feel like spending Christmas with family. Lovey, pictured at the left, is still with me and my other two fur-babies, Benji and Azra (pictured at the right).

Part of the magic this time of year, is to extend oneself and offer gifts of friendship, love, support, and kindness, that we normally forget to do during the rest of the year. I  see this as a new opportunity to grow and do something different.

And so, on behalf of Ana Maria, and Marissa Sol Martinez, my two nieces who live in Denver, CO, thank you for giving $40, in presents to Josiah, age 11, and his sister, Shyrae, 7, during this difficult time. Their mother had 3 strokes and almost lost her life. She had to learn to talk again. Her mother Anita moved in to assist her and then on December 10, Anita suffered an aneurism. She went into surgery shortly after to drain fluid from her brain. Anita suffered two massive strokes and was put on life support. Unfortunately, she didn’t make it. Due to the financial hardship the family is now experiencing, Josiah, and Shyrae, were not going to have a Christmas. No presents under the tree. But now, they will – thank you Ana, and Marissa!

I will be spending Christmas not with my family, but rather allowing myself to be a conduit for God’s purpose. I will stop here for now, as I prepare to give out $5 gift cards from McDonald’s, to anyone who appears to need it. This could happen on a  street, at a bus stop, at folks sitting on street corners, or???…

And so I do hope that in this state I’m in – the only thing that can come of it, is good. Not the expression of anger, pain, or disappointment that is useless during times like these. And so I go forth now to take care of myself, and those people who are in need.

Many blessings folks, and give the gift that keeps on giving – generosity.

Sandi

The Forgotten Sacred

In the midst of despair at the end of the day, or even the beginning, do we express gratitude... (Image: Sandi)

In the midst of despair at the end of the day, or even the beginning, do we express gratitude… (Image: Sandi)

In this fast-moving, chaotic world we inhabit, have we forgotten the simple things? When we are exhausted from a hard day’s work, when we feel perhaps bombarded with burdensome tasks, and even failure, what do we reach out to for spiritual sustenance?

In the glass of wine we hold in our hands, or even a ‘stiff’ drink, do we hold it up in thanks to the source? (Higher power, God, Creator) Or do we wallow, or even drown in the liquid? In the midst of despair at the end of the day, or even the beginning, do we express gratitude, for having another day to try, and try again, even if it looks and feels like failure?

When we sit on our back porch, a park bench, or the curb of a sidewalk, do we revel in the breeze that carries the oxygen we breathe and need to survive? (Smog and all?)

Do we notice the lizards, bugs, ants, spiders, and all creepy-crawly things around us, and remember that they too have a right to live?

Every morning, the first thing I do when I rise, is offer up my glass of water to my source, and give thanks for another day – I sip from the cup – water of life; and despite the nightmares I may have suffered, or a bad night’s sleep, I can’t help but wonder what the day ahead brings, and all the other good things that might meet me around the corner.

What about you? What is your sacred? What do you give thanks for? Will you?

Life is sacred…